It didnīt start good. I wasnīt as prepared as I wanted to be.
As much as I love modeling, I started to feel more and more disappointed in myself this year. I wasnīt very satisfied with my work, I saw many mistakes in them. I gained weight and didnīt feel very good. Well, it wasnīt just because of that...
Some things in my life just went wrong. I didnīt feel like myself, instead of doing something practical or even something I liked to do, all I did was sit in front of a computer not doing anything, besides looking at silly videos and pictures, like trying to "brainwash" myself with stupid things instead of looking right at my problems.
Problems with (ex)boyfriend didnīt add to my well-being and starting to work at three-shift system again was even worse, both physically and psychically. It was all just plain wrong.
Itīs time to change that, time to stop running away from problems and start to do something about them.
Now I have plans. So many of them and I am determined not to back off again and not to loose the goals from my sight.
Itīs time to start anew with new motivations, new goals.
Next year is going to be different. Next year Iīm going to do things differently, Iīm going to learn more, try harder and try new things.
Iīm going to show my old self what life is about.